It doesn’t always work out

You did everything right.  You checked off the tasks. You crossed all the T’s.  Now you’ve reached that elusive place called ‘happiness’. 

Wait – everything isn’t OK yet.  You are confused because you did everything you were supposed.  This isn’t fair.  If you do everything correctly you are supposed to reach your goal.

Only, it doesn’t always work like that.  Sometimes you put everything into something and it still doesn’t work.  Think about trying a new recipe.  You follow each instruction exactly but when you taste the finished product it is too salty or tastes wrong.  Sometimes a person does everything right and it still doesn’t work out.

You might ask yourself why bother?  You might decide it is to much work for too little result.  You might use the less than stellar outcome as an excuse or barrier to continuing on your journey.  Don’t.

Remind yourself that change and movement is a process.  The imperfect outcomes are just as important as the perfect ones.  Remind yourself that there is no endpoint called ‘happiness’ but the journey itself is filled with moments of happiness.  Don’t give up.  Keep trying.  Trust the process.  It really is worth it.

Live Your Life!

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.
Henry David Thoreau


Don’t be this person.  Share your song.   Life is meant to be lived.  There is going to be no magic wand so if you are looking to not live a life of quiet desperation you have to choose it.  Sometimes it is easy to forget that living is a choice.

What do you want your life to be?  Life is laughing.  Life is living up to your potential.  Life is quiet, content evenings at home, Life is adventure. Life is curiosity.  Life is both quiet and loud joy.   Life is learning. Life has struggle but doesn’t always have to be difficult.   Life is meant to be grand.  Life is love. 

Make your life everything you want it to be.  We are destined to be amazing and wonderful.  Embrace this destiny

Totally random post…

I so believe in not taking away a person’s choice – in every matter of their life.  Who am I or anyone else to tell a person that they are wrong or that I know better what the correct path for them is to take.  I feel so strongly and I’ve seen that it pops out in weird ways in my life.  For example,   I really have difficulty writing “Have a great day!” or similar throwaway lines.  Who am I to demand you have a good day.  You will notice if you read things I right I am much more likely to say “Hopes that this day has meaning” or “Wishes for a good day.” 

Yep.  That is what I am thinking about today. 

I wonder what the cat is wishing for.

Wishes that today brings to you what you are looking for.

Don't Make Me Have Fun!

This happens to me sometimes.  I am supposed to go out with a friend and I think “I am so tired.  I want to see her but I’d really like to stay home and rest.”  Maybe it is a family party and instead of looking forward to seeing and enjoying everyone, I’m just adding it as one more TASK on my “to do” list.  Maybe I mean to get a massage or my nails done for some self-care but I just don’t think I have the time. 

Hasn’t this happened to you?  Something that ‘should’ be a fun activity seems to turn into this great big commitment and trial.  Excuses from “I have too much to do” to “I need to get stuff done around the house” to “I just need down time on my own” to whatever.  Then either you force yourself to go – with anticipatory dread- and maybe even really enjoy yourself or you make an excuse and don’t go and miss out on the opportunity to enjoy yourself and connect.  Then, even if you planned on some quiet, down time, it doesn’t happen.  You find things to do around the house or feel guilty about not doing anything.  (How many times have you said “I got nothing done!”)

Doesn’t this seem a bit crazy?  Yes, I meant to say crazy.    Somewhere our priorities get a little off skew.  Yes, we need income.  Yes, we need to follow through with commitments and responsibilities.  What about enjoying life?  What about actually looking forward to going out and being with friends and family?

Ideally, we would try to find joy in all that we do but if we are going to dread something – why is it the fun things?

Next time you have something ‘fun’ planned try changing your thinking.  Think about how you enjoy being at family events or going to the art fair or going to a game.  If you start dreading the “fun” activity, question to see if you are setting up the barriers to enjoy yourself.  We benefit from embracing fun.  You have my permission to look forward to fun.  Now, give yourself that permission.

Article Share

Saw this article and thought I’d share.

http://tinybuddha.com/blog/10-happiness-tips-for-people-who-have-been-hurt/

All of us are hurt at one time or another and I always like some tips on the pain not becoming how I define myself, just a part of the whole picture of me.

I like these tips.  The only one I may disagree with is Number 4: Stop Telling Your Story.  There is a point where retelling your story over and over again is counterproductive.  It can be like a wheel that has made a rut in the road and you become stuck and can’t get out.

However, sometimes a person retells their story because no one has acknowledged it in the way the individual needs.  I was told once if someone keeps repeating the same thing to me that I’m not hearing them.  I’m not responding the way they need me to respond.  I try to keep that in mind and figure out what someone is really trying to say to me.  If you’re not feeling heard – tell people that.  Keep speaking up.